Sunday 21 April 2013

An Afternoon of Sun & Shopping

We had a lovely day out yesterday at Bents Garden Center with a family friend, Bee's Uncle Stu.

We usually start with something to eat in the amazing (if expensive) restaurant and today was no exception. Moroccan pancakes for me and hot beef sandwich for Stu. The sun was beaming down and, although there still a cool edge to the wind, we decided to eat outside. This weekend we've seen the first real sunshine of the year and it's been wonderful to share great company and food under the clear blue skies. Bee had a plate made up of bits from both mine and Stu's and did a sterling job of tasting all the different foods. She stuck to the broccoli and peas in the end. That's my girl!

Of course Bee finished way before and was soon mithering to be set loose on the playground she could see from our table, pointing and  asking "me play here mama?" and "me pah, me pah". She meant 'park'. I made my impatient little miss wait until we'd both finished eating. I can't let Bee loose to play unattended. Firstly her danger-awareness, anything from surface level changes to strangers, is zero. Secondly she often needs assistance on play equipment as her gross motor skills are under-developed and she needs to be lifted on and off or helped in other ways. After 10 (torturous for her) minutes Stu and I were ready and we headed over to the park.


She spent much of the first 10 - 15 minutes running around the various pieces of equipment, deciding which to go on. she's get so very excited that she runs and screeches, flapping her arms and flitting from one piece of equipment to the next, not being able to commit to one thing or another long enough to actually go on it. Once she's calmed down she becomes more willing to actually use the park!


Bee's first choice is always whatever climbing structure leads to the slide, although she rarely will use the slide until we've been on the park for a while. Her confidence in her mobility needs boosting much of the time and she requires a familiar adult to be near her at all times. If she moves ahead she will stop and turn around until I reach her, or take my hand and pull me along with her. Sometimes, on days when I'm having a bad day, I'm feeling tired or stressed, I envy those parents sitting around the edges. Those parents watching their children run around while they drink their coffees and chat. Then I look at my girl's beaming face as she takes my hand and says "me up mama" and I remember that I'm the lucky one. They're the ones that should be envious.


To begin with I had to lift Bee up to the 'bridge' level on the main climbing structure for her to walk back and forth, waving and giddy to be up there. A couple of times she sat down at the top of the slide but no amount of encouragement could get her down and each time she backtracked and moved back to the bridge where she felt more secure. It didn't last long, she wanted to be off exploring the next piece of equipment so I lifted her down and she was away.


It wasn't long before she started asking for the doll I'd been carrying around. Something that always helps is having a doll on hand. Often Bee will participate more if she can use her doll to do the activity first then follow and do it herself, almost like she's using the doll to 'test the waters' and see that it's safe. She pottered around for a bit, deciding what to go on before she headed back to the slide. She started up the steps, putting one foot on and using the bars to pull herself up but her courage left her and she froze, refusing to continue up by lifting her back leg on or moving off the steps by bringing her front leg back down. I used the doll to climb the steps, trying to encourage her but nothing. Bee wouldn't move. Until a small girl, much smaller than Bee, came charging past and climbed straight up the steps. Bee watched her and as soon as the girl gained the top step Bee was straight up after her and followed her down the slide! It took one tiny tot 15 seconds to accomplish what I'd spent 5 minutes trying to do. This little moment is one of the reasons we are so keen on Bee going to a mainstream school with special needs provision. Bee thrives around others that can do things she can't.


Once she'd climbed the steps and gone down the slide once that was it, there was no stopping her. She looked back for me less and charged ahead by herself more. 


After almost an hour we decided to give Bee a break and have a look around the garden center. She was starting to stumble and had already fell over a small, raised wooden bridge after not noticing the level change.

Bents is a beautiful place, full of beautiful (if waaaay out of our price range) things and I always enjoy a mooch around with Stu. On this trip we spotted something that I couldn't leave without: a Peppa Pig ball! Bee fell in love and it didn't leave her grasp for the rest of our day out. Even on our second visit to the park she took the ball around with her instead of the doll. The ball went down the slide first, the ball was pushed through the tunnel...

Bee's Peppa Pig ball created a lot of interest from the other children on the park. Every time Bee dropped or threw it there would be another child racing to pick it up. As first I kind of hovered behind Bee as she went to retrieve it, ready to pounce if she got into communication difficulties but as time passed I started to hang back. Bee will be going to school in September and regardless of what type of school she'll have to learn to deal with other children of all abilities. As always she made me proud, handling the situations with aplomb and more confidence than I'd expected, even though she did come back to me for reassurance occasionally.

We had a lovely day out in the sunshine and Bee had a brilliant time. By the time we were ready to leave she was so tired, both physically and mentally. I think she'd run her little legs to water with her double session on the park and exhausted her mind with all the stimulation and interaction with new people/situations. We made the 15-minute drive back into the town center to pick up Foz and headed home, where Bee was straight to bed and, unsurprisingly, straight to sleep!


The Wait Is Over

It's finally here. I've been dreading and looking forward to the day in equal measure for months.

Bee's statement arrived yesterday morning.

I heard the big thud on the doormat when the postman arrived and I just knew what it was. We were not expecting any parcels and the only thing that would make that kind of noise is a great big envelope full of a great big report.

It's been about a year since this process was set in motion and each month that's passed has been a worry. What type of school is right? What if we can't choose? What if she's not happy? What if she doesn't cope? Will she get bullied? The worries just go on and on and on. Based on the copies of reports we've seen from Bee's medical professionals I'd convinced myself that the council would recommend the local special needs school. Which would be the worst possible outcome as we've decided we'd like her to go to a mainstream school with designated provision for SN children. For the last few weeks other parents at nursery have been talking about the statements starting to come through and I've been dreading that thud on the doormat. Would we get what we wanted? What if we didn't? Would it be right to fight it?

As I picked up the A4-sized brown envelope I noticed the Warrington Borough Council stamp and knew what it was. I deliberated whether to open it. Bee and I were getting ready for a day out with Uncle Stu and I knew I wouldn't have the time to really digest it before we had to leave. But knowing the council's recommendation of school was just a thin envelope away I couldn't leave it unopened and skip off out for the day.

I ripped it open, a little daunted by the thickness of the papers within, hoping that I wouldn't have to scan for too long before I found their recommendation. Thankfully I found it at the bottom of the opening letter, very convenient. As my eyes took in the words my heart sank: "I can indicate that the Local Authority currently recommends that the appropriate provision to meet your child's special educational needs will be at Green Lane Special Needs School."

Devastated.

So what now? I read on and discovered that this is a draft statement. They've included a form for us to fill in where we can "make representation regarding the information contained in the proposed statement" or complain, to put it in layman's terms. It also includes a box where we can specify the school we prefer, which we've already done in the report we sent for the draft statement to begin with but they didn't seem to take much notice then. Not a good sign. I sent Foz a text message to let him know and finished getting ready for our day out. The rest of the statement would have to wait.

We had a lovely day out with Bee's Uncle Stu, which I'll do a separate post on over the next few days. The sun shone down gloriously for what seemed like the first time this year. We ate good food, looked at beautiful homewares and plants and Bee spent a ton of time on the park.

Back at home the statement beckoned and I sat down to read it through properly. I was surprised to find that the statement itself was only a small handful of pages. To be honest it was smaller than the *ahem* large report I'd sent towards it. The bulk of the envelope was copied reports from Bee's medical professionals they'd used to write it. Which was useful as it allowed me some insight into the process they'd gone through to decide Bee's educational fate. These people who make this decision will never meet Bee. They will never know my daughter as I do. They won't even know her as her therapists and medical professionals do. A panel of people will read reams and reams of paper about what she can and can't do and they'll make a decision based on those pages. Even if there's a challenge to the decision and possibly even a tribunal, they still will never meet her. Only us, if it goes that far. The whole process seems a little crazy to me, the people who ultimately make the decision are no better than strangers.

As I read the statement, listing what Bee could and couldn't do and what the school should provide, it occurred to me that I didn't disagree with anything in it. Everything they've said about Bee is right. But the conclusion they've come to is clearly very different to ours. I moved on from the statement to the reams of reports that the panel had used. Most I'd seen before as we're automatically copied in on reports anyway, the one we hadn't was the educational psychologist's final report. As I blogged about back in May 2012 (http://bit.ly/KFskPi) the educational psychologist has always been very accurate about Bee's abilities, even if it's hard to hear sometimes and I trust her judgement. This final report was very similar to the draft ones we'd seen through the previous 12 months but it was still tough to read. The content of the report, with the words "severe needs" all over the place had us both questioning our decision to go for mainstream with designated provision. Were we wrong?

Foz and I have both read through all the documents sent with Bee's statement and spent last night discussing them at length. Do we agree with the reports? Are we pushing for a mainstream school because we don't recognise the severity of Bee's needs? Are we pushing for mainstream because we preferred the school rather than because it's more suitable? Are we being unfair on Bee and pushing her too hard by pushing for mainstream? Are we being unfair on Bee and not giving her an opportunity by agreeing with the council's choice? We agonised over it. Really agonised. Never have we faced a choice that we've struggled so much with. And we only have 15 days to lodge our complaint, should we choose to make one.

After a long discussion and not a little soul-searching we came to the same conclusion: we're going to push for a mainstream school with designated provision. It may seem a little like we're completely ignoring the health professionals (who surely know best) but we feel in our hearts that we're doing the right thing by giving Bee a chance to shine in an environment more challenging for her. With a designated provision (DP school) Bee will be a small class of approximately 8 children, with 2 or 3 members of staff. There will be progress reviews every 6 months that assess how well she is coping and the minute she isn't the staff or ourselves can request that Bee move to a school more suited to her needs. Of course this in itself is a worry, Bee doesn't like change, but we feel it's worth taking the chance. In a DP school Bee will be surrounded by children at almost every level of ability and will have ample opportunity to model learning, play and behaviour. A huge part of our decision is something that not a single one of the health professionals touched on in their reports and so something the council will not have taken into account: Bee thrives when with children either older or developmentally further than she is. If you put Bee with a group of children like her she won't interact, talk to them, play with them. But with children who can 'lead' the interactions she happily moves away from us and copies their behaviour. Opportunities for her to do this is really important to us.

So what next? The council seem to be coming at their decision from a different angle to us, which of course is unsurprising as they don't know or care about our daughter in the slightest. So now our job is going to be challenging their decision. We've a form to fill in where we can "make representation" about disagreement with their choice, which I think means explain why we disagree. We can also name the specific school we would like. we have already done this so I'm not hugely hopeful that the council will listen. If they don't agree with us they will go ahead and produce the final statement, at which point if we decide to persue it we'll have to go to a meeting/tribunal to make our case. The thought of that is a little daunting but we're prepared to fight for our girl and what we believe is right for her.

 

Friday 19 April 2013

Another Day, Another Trip to A&E

Well, one thing we can never say about life with Bee is that it's uneventful!

This morning, while getting Bee ready for nursery I noticed a small lump on her inner wrist. Immediately I panicked. It looked just like a bone sticking out, as if she'd broken it. I wracked my brain trying to think when she'd had a significant fall recently or shown any pain or discomfort but nothing seemed to fit. Bee stumbles a lot due to her gross motor delay and hypotonia but she hadn't had a major fall in a couple of weeks.

I gingerly pressed at the area around it and Bee didn't react at all so I tried gently touching the lump. Nothing. No tears, no cringe, no reaction at all. It felt fairly hard but still yielded, not like bone. All kind of thoughts went through my head. The first (ridiculously) was a tumor but then, I couldn't think when I'd heard of a tumor on the wrist. So then maybe a fatty lump or cyst or some kind? But I wasn't sure if that happened in children.

Bee was still asking for nursery and as she didn't seem to be in any pain and was moving her hand freely I decided to pop in and ask the advice of her teachers. It's a nightmare getting a GP's appointment.

On arrival all said it was unusual but as she wasn't in any pain and was off playing with the toys they were happy for her to stay and would ring me with any problems. I decided to go home, pack a bag and take her to A&E after nursery.

So:
Milk, syringes & tube....check
Nappies, wipes & creme....check
 Spare clothes....check
Pyjamas & slippers....check
 Toys....check
Laptop & DVD's....check

It sounds a lot but from grim experience we go in expecting it to be a few hours and end up being admitted, sometimes for days on end. These days I always go well prepared: a small bag with nappies, toys & things for the day plus a suitcase stored in the car with extra things for a longer stay.

After collecting Bee from an uneventful morning at nursery we headed straight to A&E at our local hospital. After booking us in the lady at reception asked if we knew our was to the children's section of A&E. Do we ever! We're so well known in the children's ward that we're always greeted by name and all the staff are really pleased to see Bee. Today was no different, a lovely nurse on duty was someone we'd seen many times during Bee's various stays and she was happy to see the big changes in Bee since her last visit.

We had an initial consultation with the doctor, who asked lots of questions and examined Bee's wrist. She agreed that Bee wasn't in pain or discomfort and had a full range of movement so it was extremely unlikely to be a break. She said it was most likely a ganglion cyst, which is harmless, but just to be on the safe side she would send us to get some xrays done then take another look. So, back into the waiting room until we were called to radiology. 


Bee loves the waiting room. It's full of exciting new toys and books, not to mention other people to nosey over. She became particularly entranced by a teenage girl dressed in school PE gear and with a cut over her eye. After slowly walking back and forth past her a few times, slyly watching her out of the corner of her eye, Bee finally plucked up the courage to stand in front of the girl, point and tell me "uh oh". Thankfully the girl and her dad weren't offended and laughed about it. A few times in the next hour of waiting the girl went away, maybe for the toilet or the vending machines and each time Bee went over to her empty chair, had a good examine of it just to make sure she was definitely gone, then turned to the dad and asked "where is? Where is?" I laughed and laughed. It's not at all like Bee to be comfortable with strangers and her concern about the health and whereabouts of the teenager was lovely. 

We waited about an hour for Bee's xrays. During that time I googled 'ganglion cyst' and found that they are indeed harmless, although can be painful and sometimes need surgical removal. From my reading it appeared they were most common in adults and I could find very little except for various posts on parent forums for ganglion cysts in toddlers. The webpages I browsed seemed to conclude they were generally caused by repetitive strain or injury, which didn't seem to fit with Bee and they could go away on their own. Sometimes, if they didn't disappear or became painful they could be drained of the fluid with a needle or surgically removed under anesthetic. Slightly worrying.

Bee's xrays were not fun. Bee will not voluntarily sit still and certainly would not understand to keep her hand still on an xray plate so I had to sit her on my knee and clamp her arm in the right position. Not a great experience. Bee struggled and cried but it was a neccessary evil and it was over fairly quickly. To calm her tears the radiographer offered Bee an 'I've been brave' sticker and, to Bee's complete joy, a Peppa Pig certificate! Honestly it was like flicking a switch. The tears stopped, the smile came out and she was joyful little Bee again.

So back to the ward to await a doctor's perusal of her xrays and diagnosis of her wrist. It was another hour or so before we were seen again, this time by a different doctor. She'd looked at Bee's xrays and there's definitely no break or fracture and the most likely diagnosis is a ganglion cyst. The doctor said she'd never seen one in a child as young as Bee and would like us to go back and see a consultant in a week's time. Which we're happy to do but it is a little worrying. If it's just a harmless cyst that should go away on it's own why do we need to go back and see a consultant? At least we'll only have a week to wait and find out.


Thursday 18 April 2013

Boo Rye


Bee very much enjoyed our recent bus ride and I wanted to share some of my pictures. As I drive we don't travel on buses very often but when my car was in for an MOT recently we got to ride the local bus home. The whole thing was a new (to her memory) experience for Bee. She loved being in the bus station, I thought her heart might explode with excitement when she saw all the buses lined up in the bays.

Luckily ours hadn't arrived and we were able to watch it pulling in, with much squealing and flappy arm-waving. Bee helped pay for my ticket (she goes free) and, once I'd parked the pram up, I let her choose the seats. I think she'd used up her store of new-experience confidence for the day and used chose the nearest seats possible to the pram. I helped her on to the seat next to the window and we spent a very enjoyable 10-minute journey home watching people and traffic, counting houses and naming colours of cars. Even though she insists everything is pink.

Since getting the car nearly 3 years ago it's become all too easy to rely on it and not worry about struggling on public transport. As Bee enjoyed her bus ride so much I'm determined we will take more short journeys on a bus. Watch this space!




Whoops

It may have been a mistake to walk past this section of the toy shop...


Cute Factor

I have nothing of interest to report today, I just had to share some cuteness from over the last few days.

In our town center shopping mall there a two very special rides that Bee loves to have a turn on each time we shop. She calls them her "Pi Pi rye". A couple of days ago we nipped into town to collect Foz from work and couldn't pass one of the rides without having a turn!


(Please excuse the pyjamas, she had a poorly tummy!)

Happy squealing and screeching is something Bee does a lot when she's excited, she also does lots of flapping with her arms! She's a very demonstrative child!

Bee's grandparents bought her a lovely gift this week, a Disney Brave doll. Bee is convinced the doll is her as they have the same hair so she calls her "me doll". I think her gift went down well...



Winner!

Our visit also coincided with my auntie's birthday and we'd bought her a cake. After the 'happy birthday' singing and while my auntie posed for a photograph I just captured my Bee deciding she didn't want to wait for her share any longer...

 
She'd taken herself into the kitchen, got a bowl and spoon out of the drawers and coming running in saying "me eat up!" Cheeky princess!!

Sunday 14 April 2013

Party Time!

Yesterday Bee attended her first birthday party. She doesn't have many friends. Her complete lack of social skills mean she doesn't make any of her own and I don't have many friends with small children that we can socialize with. It was a joint party for four different children, one of which is Bee's little cousin Ryan and I'd been worrying a lot about it. It would be busy, with lots of strange people we'd never met and not to mention noisy. I was worried about the very real possibility of Bee spending the entire party crying on my knee, overwhelmed by it all. It wouldn't be the first time it's happened in busy, unfamiliar situations.

I'd spent two days talking about the party and trying to answer her many "why" questions about birthdays and parties. We'd also watched the 'birthday' episode of Something Special many times, talking about what was happening and how she would get to do similar at Ryan's party. I was just hopeful it would all help.

On Saturday morning we dressed in our finery, Bee was very excited about her party dress and spent much time wandering around the living room pointing at herself and sticking her tummy out. Not so much fun was the hair brushing, but that never is, stupid curls!

The party was at a local function room and was due to have a DJ, entertainer, the works and when we arrived it was in full swing: loud music and a dance floor full of running, jumping, shouting, dancing, chasing, screaming kids and a DJ orchestrating in the middle of it all. 

We found Foz's sister, Ryan and Fox's parents at a table towards the back (relief) and joined them. Bee, although quiet, seemed quite interested in the children on the dance floor and I asked if she wanted to go and do some dancing but "no" was the fairly firm answer, I didn't push her. I persevered though and asked every few minutes until eventually something changed and she suddenly decided that dancing sounded like the most fun thing ever! She was all squealing and flappy arms! Bee took my hand and led me to the dance floor but I couldn't get her to move beyond the fringe. I crouched down next to her, took her hands and tried to initiate some groovy moves but all she wanted to do was sit and my knee and watch. Which was fine and lasted a few minutes before we were back at our table. This to-ing and fro-ing went on for a while, each trip to the dance floor lasting a little longer than the last. But it wasn't until the DJ brought out lots of large modelling balloons that Bee really forgot herself and went in for the kill.
 
Bee really loves balloons and we had a lovely session of squealing and scrunchy face as she waved them all around, greatly amused at their different to normal balloons.

And look: we made a hat!

The DJ set up lots of games using the balloons: who can stick them to the ceiling, who can make the best model etc etc. Bee doesn't understand enough to join in so we moved back to our table as the party took a more games-based turn.





The buffet opened and Bee was the only child that made a bee-line (ahem) for the platter with raw carrot and cucumber sticks, which she thoroughly enjoyed and followed with more toddler-like behaviour: a plate of cakes! Her dietician would be thrilled!


I can make a hat too Mama!
After food it was back to the dance floor for pass-the-parcel. Bee has never played before but was thrilled by the sight of the DJ holding a present. The kids were split into two groups, boys and girls, and we duly took out place with the girls. Bee was one of the youngest there and sat on my knee to play, partly due to her confidence and partly because she still needs a lot of support and direction to join in. I briefly tried to explain what was going to happen but the music started and we were off. The parcel came to Bee and she eagerly grabbed it, pulling at the paper. I had to swiftly pass it to the next child, which Bee looked a little perturbed about but she took it in her stride. As the parcel made it's way around the circle again I kept telling her that we had to pass it along until the music stopped but this time when it reached her she tried to hold on a little longer. I guided her hands across to the next little girl and she reluctantly let go.

"Let go Bee"         -         "Why?"

As the game went along the parcel kept bypassing Bee and each time it did she gripped a little harder and complained a little louder until finally there was a winner and Bee hadn't had a turn. I tried to explain the game was finished and the tears started. In retrospect pass-the-parcel must seem the cruelest game in the world: you show a child a present, let them hold it then take it away for another child to have. Torture. Ah well, it's all experience and to see her joining in with the other children and not hiding at the back was wonderful.

After her pass-the-parcel meltdown her tiredness started to show through, she was happy just to sit by the side of the dance floor and play with a burst balloon, despite my attempts to get her interested in joining in.


The party came to an end soon after and it was time to leave. Overall it had been a very successful adventure and Bee was thrilled to be given a party bag as we left. The three hours we'd spent there had been plenty enough for her, any longer and I think she would have descended into tired tears and tantrums.

Home again and it was party bag time! There was cake, some sweeties (which mama had to eat), some bubbles and a pink bouncy ball. Winner! All that was left to do was enjoy a quiet couple of hours with cake, a cuppa for mama and some Mr Tumble before it was time to pick daddy up from work.


Our first party had gone more successfully than I could have hoped and, although they always reinforce for me just how delayed Bee's development is, each time we do something like this I see the small steps of progress Bee is making with her social skills and confidence issues. I'm so proud of her.

Saturday 13 April 2013

Monkey Forest

On Wednesday we were lucky enough to have Foz's day off coincide with Bee's last day of Easter holidays freedom. We decided to do something nice together as (for various reasons) it would be our last trip out for a few months.
Somewhere I love to go is Monkey Forest in Stoke-on-Trent, a 60-acre forest where Barbary Macaques roam free in as natural environment as possible. There are no cages and 140 monkeys live in safety and freedom. The only fences are small, wooden ones that keep the visitors on the paths, the monkeys don't respect them! Monkey Forest also work towards the conservation of the species and have released over 600 Barbary Macaques back into the wild. I really, really like this place!


On arrival at Monkey Forest Bee immediately started with "pam, pam" as we parked. This isn't unusual, in unfamiliar places she craves the security of the pram and will absolutely refuse to walk. If we try she just crumples into a ball on the floor and won't move. So into the pram she goes.

We queued a little to get in, it's Easter holidays after all but we'd been talking to Bee the whole time about the monkeys we were going to see and she seemed very excited. At the ticket booth there were Monkey Forest leaflets so I grabbed one for Bee to look at before we entered. She spotted a baby monkey and that immediately captured her imagination, "baba oo oo mama!" with frantic pointing, clearly she loves baby anything, not just dolls!

We had to pass through the restaurant, gift shop, picnic area section of the park first before heading through the double gates and into the monkey's domain! We walked down the path through the start of the forest, watching all the trees and looking for monkeys but it wasn't until the trees opened out into a large grassed area that we saw them. Monkeys! Lots of them!


I parked the pram up next to a conveniently-placed bench and tried to interest Bee in them but as soon as she saw her first monkey she buried her face in the side of the pram saying "no, no" over and over. Oh dear. It appears Bee likes fake, cartoon or cuddly monkeys but not so much the real thing.

Despite this worrying start Bee wasn't crying, which was hopeful, so we ploughed on. It's a long, winding walk around the 60 acre forest, with the monkeys living in two troops, so there's plenty to see and even without them as an attraction it's a lovely stroll. We made our way around, stopping frequently to try and interest Bee, watch the monkeys or to take pictures. As the walk progressed Bee was more willing to watch the monkeys but still refused to get out of the pram. We unsurprisingly had more success with the baby monkeys, they went down relatively well.

We made a full circuit of the forest and then back out of the double-gate for a visit to the restaurant, gift shop and park.After a plate of chips for Bee (blame the dietician!) we had a mooch around the gift shop. It was very small and very busy. Bee picked a monkey cup and a monkey travel cup and we moved to the till. Bee managed to get herself stranded behind a line of other customers after moving away to look at some monkey teddies and promptly melted down when we tried to encourage her to walk amongst them back towards us. This involved tears and collapsing in a puddle of immovable flop on the floor. Once outside in the open space and away from all the people and chatter she was absolutely fine, meltdown over and done with, forgotten about.


The park went very well despite the gazillions of other (much larger) children charging around and the almost deafening amount of screaming and shouting going on. Bee needed support to play as the bark surface was very difficult for her to walk on and she couldn't walk without holding my hand. The equipment all had ladders instead of steps so I had to lift Bee on to allow her to use the slide, bridge or tunnel. She's getting mighty heavy too.
After a couple of turns on the slide and a stampy walk across the bridge Bee started asking for Peppa Pig. So we trotted back over to daddy, who was minding the pram with all our bags, picked up Peppa and made our way back. Bee was very eager to give Peppa a turn on the little rocking animals, we tried all three. One happened to be taken at first and Bee decided the best way to move the little girl's turn along was to stand right next to her and stare until she moved. Deary me. Still, Peppa got her turn and the little girl went to play on the slide. Everyone wins.

 










Of course then Peppa had to have a turn on everything!

It became obviously after half an hour or so that Bee was beginning to tire, she plonked herself in the center of the tunnel leading to the slide and refused to budge. No matter how many children pushed past, or clambered over and around her she wouldn't move. Plus the more that did so the more upset she became. I had to clamber up the ladder and half into the tunnel myself before she would make any effort towards getting herself out!

I wanted another trip around the monkey enclosure but Bee had spotted something far more fun.... a pay-to-jump trampoline! She does what she always does when she wants to show you something: grabs your hand and pulls you right up to the thing she wants or is trying to show you. The 6-bed trampoline had a large net around it and four other children already jumping away. We umm'ed and ahh'ed for a few minutes as, despite Bee's insistence that she wanted a go, we were unsure if she'd cope with the other children leaping so noisily around her. We'd of course already had the first meltdown in the giftshop and then the tired movement refusal on the park. But still, at £2 for 5 minutes we decided it was worth the chance. The lady supervising allowed me to hop on with her and this is how it went:


Winning!

I had a little trouble during our 5 minutes as Bee couldn't understand why she had to stick to her own trampoline and wasn't free to climb across them all as she chose. Still in the main she loved it. She recently even began leaving the floor ever so slightly when she jumps, rather than just going up on to her toes, a brilliant achievement. Our 5 minutes were up all too soon and we had to get off. Bee was not impressed and asked for another turn but time was marching on, we had about an hour until the park closed and we wanted another walk around the monkey enclosure.

So, shoes on for the walk across to the forest. We hadn't taken 10 steps when Bee stumbled and fell. That's when we knew it was time for the pram. Bee generally is clumsier than others due to her delayed gross motor skills but when she starts to fall a lot we know her little legs are giving up for the day and it's time for a rest.

Daddy gets a kiss from Peppa
Back in the forest we decided to hover around the first grassy area rather than trek all around the forest. There was a large group of monkeys to admire and it was near to the exit for when Bee was ready to leave. I parked the pram up next to the fence and got my camera out to take some photos. It was at this point I was very lucky that a monkey decided to walk across the path right in front of me. Wow!


Only a few minutes had passed when Bee piped up with "me out mama", really Bee?? I was thrilled. It was the first inclination she'd shown to want to leave the security of the pram while we were anywhere near the monkeys. I lifted her straight out and plonked her on the path beside me. She stood at the fence for a few minutes watching the monkeys before I decided to push my luck. Moving father along the fence I shouted "come on Bee, come and see the baby monkeys" and to my complete surprise, she very happily followed me! 


We watched the baby monkeys playing for a while, they were very cute gamboling around the grass together. All was going swimmingly until Bee said something to me that I didn't hear. I leaned down to ask "pardon baby?" and my big DSLR camera, which I'd so cleverly hung around my neck so I could hold her hand, smacked her full in the face. Well that was it. There was no more co-operating, no more happy monkey-watching, she just collapsed into a big ball of screaming tears.

And that was the end of our day at Monkey Forest. Well done mama. Epic. Fail.

We made our way back to the car. Bee wasn't really hurt, it was more the shock that had made her cry, but she was too tired to want to interact anymore so we decided it was time to leave. The park was shutting in a little over 30 minutes anyway.

It was nearly teatime by this point and we had a 45 minute drive back to Warrington in front of us so we decided to eat out before we got on the motorway. I asked Bee if she wanted to and her answer was "nye num nums ow" (nice food out) in a very excited voice. So that was that.


I'll have this one Mama
We ate a carvery I know of in Stoke (where I went to university) which is by a small marina used by narrow(canal)boats. It's a nice view out of the windows for the middle of industrial Stoke, plus Foz and I love a carvery. Bee had a little plate of her own filled with carrots and green beans, which she shoveled in and still asked for more!





 
When we'd finished we had a lovely 10-minutes by the water, blowing bubbles for Bee then chasing them as the wind took them. Despite her tiredness she did a lot of happy-screeching and giggling, even running, in her own unique way!


Evening was setting in and it's still very cold here so our tired Bee hitched a ride back to the car with daddy. We find these days that despite how tired she is, or how long a day she's had she will never sleep unless she's in bed. She won't sleep in the pram or in the car. Mainly this is a good thing as it means she is always keen for bedtime but every so often Bee gets so tired that she makes a constant drone noise that doesn't end. It's purely how she deals with tiredness but it can be a little frustrating when we know all she needs is to just let herself drop off. On this day there was no tired drone, just contented quiet while she listened to her Peppa Pig CD.

All in all it was a very successful day out, Bee maybe didn't show as much interaction with the monkeys as we'd have liked and we had a couple of meltdowns but she coped admirably with the scores of children, all the textures and sounds and even did some walking around the forest to boot. I'd call that a win :)


Happy girl!

Friday 12 April 2013

Shopping

Bee loves to shop.

I mean really loves it.

Whenever I tell her we're off to the shops I get excited squeals, arm flapping and lots of stamping. Usually it's just to Tesco for our weekly food shop, something I often see other kids throwing tantrums about. But not my Bee. She loves to bring her little, pink, Minnie Mouse trolley and find the items we're shopping for. Shopping has always been a great confidence-builder for Bee, she experiences new people, new textures, new situations, and I always encourage her love of shopping as much as I can. 

The downside is: I think I'm creating a money-spending monster! I often joke that if my Bee goes on to marry her husband is going to hate me! 

This week my car had it's MOT (passed thankfully!) so Bee and I got to spend some time mooching around the town center, browsing in the shops. Much to her dad's dismay I can never seem to come away empty handed and we managed to pick up a pack of Peppa Pig Bath Jigsaws. However when we got home they sneakily went away for her birthday in September and she's forgot all about them.

In one of the empty shops in the shopping center is a very large 'what's on' advert for Liverpool Echo Arena and who should be up there but the one and only Justin Fletcher! We walked past this multiple times during the course of our trip and each time we had to stop when Bee excitedly chattered about it and tried to tell anyone passing that Justin was up on the wall! She loves him so. 

We know Justin is on tour and seriously considered buying tickets, despite them being £40ish for adults and children alike (shocking). However after much thought we decided that Bee probably wouldn't get out of it what we want her to. The Echo Arena is just that: a huge arena. If we're somewhere near the back or even just the middle Justin would be tiny on stage and I don't think Bee would really follow what was happening for a full 2-hour show. The show is also billed as 'Justin & Friends' and features a whole host of characters form the CBeebies channel that she isn't really interested in. So, we'll leave it and go for 'In the Night Garden Live' again later in the year.


Of course we couldn't leave the shopping center without a go on the "Pi Pi rye", a highlight of Bee's day every single time!


Sunday 7 April 2013

Making Muddy Puddles

Bee loves to bake and always does a lot of baking with her dad. It's kind of their 'thing' on his days off and I always get some yummy cakes out of it! We've been so busy recently that we've not had much chance for baking but for Easter she was bought a Peppa Pig Muddy Puddles cake pack, a perfect opportunity to get back into the habit!

"That one goes there..."
So, funpod, equipment and ingredients at the ready we got going!


We had fun feeling the ingredients before using them, which is a real achievement for Bee. Her tactile defensiveness has often stopped her from fully engaging in some activities we do. Even with painting she doesn't like it being on her hands. For her to handle the flour and 'messy' textures is a big win!

"I'll stick this here..."
We emptied, poured, measured, mixed and filled. She still struggles a little with the fine motor skills of holding a case still while she fills it but overall she did brilliantly. My real challenge is trying to stop her eating everything in sight before it's cooked!


Of course the eating is the best part though!

Smile Bee!

Bookworms

Anyone who knows me will know I have a deep and abiding love of books and reading. It's something my parents instilled in me as a child and even now there's not much I'd rather be doing than reading a good book with a cup of tea. Rock and roll.
I want Bee to enjoy books as I have, to get the same pleasure from them and have her world opened by a love of reading. She owns a lot of books but for the last few months I've been taking Bee to the big library in Warrington town center. It's something I used to do as a child and always loved spending time there, reading and choosing books to take home. She's been very much enjoying it although I think is still getting her head around the concept.

Me: "So are these the books you want to take home?"
Bee: "Me pay"
Me: "No honey, we don't need to pay, we can borrow them for free"
Bee: "Why?"
Me: "Because the library will let us take the books home to read for free but then we have to bring them back for someone else to borrow"
Bee: "Why?"....

This is a conversation we've had more than once at the library so far. I suppose for a child who's so used to shopping, visiting a library can seem an awful lot like a bookshop and understanding the differences can be a little challenging. She loves the whole experience though.


My only challenge during our visits is keeping Bee calm in the pram while I browse for myself. She has a habit of shouting "out Mama! Me out!" over and over until I release her. Of course then there's lots of running around and squealing loudly in excitement, to which I follow trying to shush her and explain about our "quiet voices" (yeah right!) 

This week we came home with (amongst others) a Peppa Pig christmas book and an In the Night Garden christmas book. It doesn't matter to Bee, if she sees Peppa or Makka Pakka she's sold! We brought another handful home too as well as all of the ones Mama chose!


Saturday 6 April 2013

Why?

One of Bee's main challenges is her lack of language skills. A little while back when I collected Bee from nursery a member of staff mentioned they were really pleased as Bee had used a couple of words they hadn't heard from her. They then went on to say that she was now up to a handful of words she was regularly using. Which was great, except at home she was using dozens...

So over the Christmas break, while she was with me all day, every day I decided to make a list of the words she was using and how she was pronouncing them. I'd lost track of my old lists when she hit 50 words and it concerned me that, although we knew she could use a lot, nursery wasn't hearing them from her. By the time nursery started again in January my list had over 90 distinct words, yet within nursery she was only using 5/6. Of course, nursery isn't unique: Bee doesn't talk much at all outside of home, regardless of where she is. She especially doesn't do well if put on the spot. I decided to keep on with my list, adding to it whenever I heard a new word from Bee. We're now up to 143. Compared to the average toddler milestones (a 2-year-old should be at around 200-300 words) Bee is still quite a way behind but she's progressing and her language seems to be on a steep learning curve at the moment. The words can still take a little deciphering though: "ba" could be bath or bag and we rely a lot on context.

My favourite at the moment is "pi pi dee dee" for Peppa Pig DVD and I'll always love the way she calls Mr Tumble "beebul".

In the last two weeks she's found a new word which was thrilling at first and now I just want to gag her. This was a conversation earlier today:

Bee: "Mama, Pi pi dee dee"
Me: "Not at the moment"
Bee: "Why?"
Me: "Because we're going to get Daddy from work soon
Bee: "Why?"
Me: "Because he's been working all day and now it's time for home"
Bee: "Why?"
Me: "Because Daddy needs to go to work to earn pennies"
Bee: "Why?"
Me: "So we can pay our bills and buy nice things for Bee"
Bee: "Why?"......

.......and on it goes. And on and on and on. I don't really have any experience of it (Bee being our first) but I feel most kids would reach a natural stopping point when there's no longer a reason to ask why. We don't get that with Bee. We get to a point where we go round in a question/answer circle as there's sometimes just no answer for "why".

It's a wonderful development, we're genuinely thrilled that Bee has reached a level of curiosity about the world and the things going on around her, enough to ask about them. However she does have a habit of being very, very repetitive. We often have the same conversations and the same seems to be true of "why", it comes after every single statement/comment/answer we give. Earlier today we had a conversation that went like this:

Bee: "Mama, play doll"
Me: "Of course we can play dolls honey"
Bee: "Why?"
Me: "Well, because you asked to"
Bee: "Why?"
Me: "Well I think because you want to play dolls"
Bee: "Why?"
Me: "Because you like your dolls"
Bee: "Why?"....

....And so on. Sometimes I think she asks as a matter of routine, rather than a genuine curiosity as to the answer. The above conversation doesn't seem to make much sense as she's asking me to explain why she wants to do a certain thing. Still, Bee asking "why" all the time is opening up more conversational opportunities with her and we don't seem to be stuck as much in the same topics that she will normally stick to. Which can only be a good thing!