Friday 30 September 2011

Partay!

Three has come around so quickly, it almost hit us by surprise. Practically overnight our baby girl has turned into a bright, happy, cheeky, demanding, crafty and tantrum-throwing toddler. Her understanding, speech and mobility is improving all the time and we're confident that it won't be much longer before she's catching her peers.
 
We wanted to spend Bee's birthday doing something she would love, which meant soft play, soft play and more soft play! We chose a sensory play centre about 40 minutes away from us. The pictures on the website looked really good and (as we wanted to take advantage of the last of this summer's sunshine) we planned a picnic in a nearby park for afterwards. So with my mum, brother in tow we set out to meet Clare & Isla.

Photo courtesy of http://www.dfosterphotography.com/index.html




Unfortunately the soft play we'd chosen wasn't as good as the website suggested and it was a long way to go for something that we could have done on our doorstep but our girls had a great time anyway. 



Photo courtesy of http://www.flickr.com/photos/gimbulate
 After an exhausting play session (for the adults!) and a slight detour (thanks sat nav!) we went for dinner at a local park. Thankfully the sun was shining and we found a nice shady place under a tree and by a lake. We munched on sandwiches, crisps, cakes and chocolate.... with some token apple slices and grapes thrown in.


Photo courtesy of http://www.dfosterphotography.com/index.html  
 


 
Each year we have promised ourselves that the next birthday Bee will be able to have some of her own birthday cake. And this year we were finally able to keep that promise! On her third birthday Bee had her first slice of birthday cake!

And it went down very well!

Especially the icing! I think my girl has a sweet tooth!


Isla was also very impressed with her slice of cake and even had a good go at helping Bee with hers. Then they both had a go at each other's soggy leftovers. Lovely!




 
 We finished the afternoon with a walk through the park, Bee on her walker and Isla with Bee's new baby pram. Both girls are doing so well with their mobility. At one stage I could never have imagined walking through a park with my girl walking next to me.

To see her now, so independent and confident, makes me marvel at her strength of character. She inspires me every single day.

Wednesday 28 September 2011

Happy Birthday!

Today is Bee's 3rd birthday. It's such a cliche to say that time flies but it really does.

Three years ago today, at 5:12pm, I was being delivered of a tiny bundle that would change our life. Bee had a difficult start: SCBU, feeding problems, breathing problems and even when we got her home she was still in and out of hospital with illness. She missed milestones and we despaired, confused doctors with her undiagnosed problems and still managed to melt everyone she met with her constant smile, curly hair and big brown eyes.

Two years ago today we were throwing a big party in honour of that first difficult year coming to a close. We had answers and medical interventions and life was finally becoming slightly easier. Bee couldn't sit unaided, much less toddle about like others her age but she still tackled every challenge thrown at her with aplomb.

One year ago tomorrow Bee was crawling, making sounds that sounded suspiciously like the beginnings of words and understanding more and more of what was going on around her.

Now, as she's turning 3, Bee has a vocabulary of over 30 words, is flying on her walker and has impeccable manners. She charms everyone she meets and grows in confidence every single day. We still have challenges with feeding and some sensory issues but after her severe developmental delay the fact that she's almost caught up with others her age just blows me away.

Today we spent a lovely day at a soft play centre then a picnic in the park in the glorious sunshine. Bee's Grandma and Uncle Chris came along, as did our lovely friends Clare & Isla. We've had lots of family around to visit and Bee has been spoilt with cards and gifts so thank you to everyone for your thoughtfulness.


Happy 3rd birthday Bethany May.
We love you all the world xx

Tuesday 27 September 2011

Playdate

We got to spend an afternoon with Bee's best friend Isla this weekend.We shared cuddles, giggles and lots of cake!

Mmmmmm crisps!

My little Bee managed to wheedle her birthday present out of Clare early. Although, if I'm being honest, it was more at the urging of a rather over-excited Clare! And what a wonderful birthday present it was!














 
Bee is in love. Tuesday she had to take her new bag to nursery with her, along with her little 'Mi Moo'.

We finished our afternoon with lots of cake and a lovely time was had by all!






Yum yum!








Monday 26 September 2011

A Walk in the Park

This weekend Bee and I spent a lovely afternoon on Sankey Valley Canal with my Mum and her dogs. The sun shone down and, despite the dogs, Bee did lots of walking. Her confidence around them is getting better, although she's still very afraid if they come too close and hysterical if they bark.

We did lots of walking and helped Bee collect found objects to put in her little In the Night Garden tin. It's a great game to help combat her tactile defensiveness.

That may well have been the last of the meagre sunshine for this year so I'm glad we got out and enjoyed it!



















Nursery

Well, we've done it! Bethany has survived her first session at nursery. And her second, third and fourth! Equally as impressive: I survived them too!
Heading into nursery
Her first session was only an hour long and my Mum and I, who I had took along as Foz had to work, were able to stay. Bee was able to play with the nursery assistants while I did a lot of form-filling and boring stuff like that. Every so often Bee would come scooting over with her walker, just to check I was still about then she'd scoot off again, eager to find the next new toy! It was a lovely session, the nursery introduce one child at a time so we had the full attentions of the staff while we were there. They were able to start getting to know Bee and we were able to get to know them, very important for a parent like me who's never left her child with a stranger.


The nursery is wonderful. It's a long, low building split into 3 sections. At one end is the private nursery, in the middle is the mainstream nursery and at the other end is the special needs provision nursery. Bee's nursery is split into two rooms: a carpeted room with the main bulk of toys plus a kiddie play kitchen, reading corner and such. There there's the craft room with lino floors, tables and chairs plus my favourite part: an interactive projection on the floor that responds to the childrens touch. There's also a dedicated sensory room that the children have free rein of and an outdoor area that is completely covered from the elements and has sand & water tables, ride-ons etc. Each of the three connected nurseries has a similar garden of their own and all three open out on to the main garden, which runs the length of the entire building. It's a massive expanse of grass with winding pathways marked out like roads and, in the middle, a giant sand pit with a huge play structure. In the back corner is a small, innocuous-looking shed which turns out is the 'den-building shed', full of chairs, sheets, brooms and other vital den-building supplies. What more reasons do I need to love this place!?

Our hour seemed to pass very quickly and by the time it was up Bee was not ready to leave, I had to bribe her out to the car with promises of Mr Tumble when she got home!

The second visit was scheduled to be a longer one, an hour & a half in length and this time there were other children there. I was supposed to leave her for a short time during the session but only as far as the staff room for a cuppa, just far enough that she couldn't see me but I was still on hand incase she got hysterical. There's one-way mirrors so I was able to watch what Bee was up to without her being able to see me. Turns out she had a blast and barely noticed I was missing. I was so proud of my confident little girl although a small treacherous part of me felt a little disappointed that she hadn't cried and clung like a limpet around my neck.



That second session went so well that I was actually quite looking forward to the third, her first full 3 hour session when I would bite the bullet and go home. Although her behaviour so far showed all the signs that I wasn't going to have any problems. So I was surprised when we pulled into the carpark and Bee started to cry and say "no" over and over. Here was what I had dreaded: guilt-inducing hysterics on nursery drop-offs. She wouldn't walk into nursery, wouldn't take her coat off, wouldn't allow me to put her down, wouldn't look at any of the toys.... here was my disappointment about not feeling wanted the week before coming back to bite me in the ass. After a few minutes of crying and telling me "no, home" I managed to encourage Bee to sit next to me by some toys. One of her teachers came over to play with us and as Bee's attention turned slowly from me to her I managed to sneak away. By 'away' I mean outside of the room to sit and watch her through the one-way mirrors. It took all of 20 seconds for her to notice I was gone and the hysterical crying resumed. This time interspersed with "mama home". Oh the guilt.
I've never felt anything like it, like I was abandoning her. Even though I would only be in the next room I kept thinking how it must appear to Bee: like I'd just left her with complete strangers and not coming back. What a bewildering experience it must for children when their parents drop them off and walk away.

Thankfully Bee's teacher managed to calm her down with a variety of distraction techniques and I went to sit in the staff room with a fortifying cup of tea. Every so often someone would come in and let me know that she was ok and play with this toy or that toy or, at one point, in the sensory room. Occassionally I would sneak a peep through the one-way mirrors at what she was up to but I tried to keep this to a minumum. Bee had settled and was playing happily, I needed to do my own version of the same. It was decided between myself and the staff that we would shorten Bee's time at nursery for that session, give her the chance to realise I would come back and not leave her there. She was all smiles when I appeared, shouting "mama" and showing me the doll she'd found to play with. What a wonderful feeling when your little one is so full of excitement from their day, makes all those tears worth it. So although not a completely sucessful third session it finshed better than it began.

The day of session four dawned and I tried to prepare Bee early, so when we started getting ready for nursery it wasn't a shock. "We're going to nursery today honey, going to play with all the toys..." etc etc. Each time I mentioned it I got a very firm "no", not a good sign. Still, it had to be done. So 12:30 found us pulling into the nursery carpark. There was no tears this time although a lot of "no" in a distinctly wobbly voice and she wouldn't walk either, had to be carried in. We had the same battle over getting her coat off, by the time I succeeded you'd have thought hanging a coat on a peg was the most exciting game ever!

Bee's teacher took her hand and led her into the room, moaning though she was at least it wasn't outright hysterics. I followed them in as Bee kept checking I was behind her, I wanted her to settle before I left. It wasn't long before she was engrossed in the toys so again I snuck away. She began to cry when she noticed I'd gone but it only took a matter of a minute for the staff to settle her and she was happy again. This time I felt secure enough to leave her, so I came home for a cup of tea. The staff had assured me that they would ring if Bee became too upset and we agreed I would return after an hour to check on her and see if it was suitable to leave her for the remainder of the 3 hour session. When I popped back I could see though the one-way mirror that Bee was quite happily playing with the toys and chattering to herself so, without letting her see me, I snuck away again and returned home for the remaining hour, comfortable that she was being looked after and not distressed at all.

Our next session is tomorrow and I'm hoping that Bee continues to improve on the drop-off. I know she loves the time at nursery - this past saturday she specifically asked to go, she just needs to get over that initial separation anxiety. I think her nursery is going to be a wonderful place for Bee to grow and develop. Their facilities are second-to-none and the staff are so supportive and inclusive. The children from all three nurseries get to spend time together through the sessions so Bee will get to mix with children of different ages and abilities. I'm so excited about the next two years she will spend there.

Makaton Monday

Mmmmmm cake! In two days time it will be Bee's 3rd birthday and we can't wait for her to have her first taste of birthday cake this year!


Monday 19 September 2011

Makaton Monday

Bee likes to give her pennies to the person at the till when we go shopping. She doesn't really understand the concept of money and paying for things yet but I think it makes her feel important and involved to take part in the shopping.


Thursday 1 September 2011

One Week and Counting...

Today marks one week until Bee starts nursery.

Feeling: apprehensive, nervous, excited...

In so many ways next week can't come quick enough but I could wait forever. I've never left Bee with anyone who wasn't close family and so the thought of leaving her in the care of complete strangers is terrifying. Even if it is only for 3 hours twice a week. I know her quirks and foibles, her likes and dislikes, her tolerances and what she means when she's only making sounds. What if the staff don't understand her? What if she's unhappy? What if she doesn't make friends? What if she's left out or left behind?

Despite my worries, every day it becomes more apparant that Bee is ready for nursery. In part I can't help but feel she's being held back by being at home with me all the time. There's only so much I can teach her before she needs the interaction, encouragement and friendship of her peers. Even in group speech therapy she dives right in and doesn't look back, watching the other children intently and pushing herself forward to be included.

I'm so proud of her, of her confidence and willingness to join in but my heart aches at watching her leave the baby years behind and I just want to cling on and not let her grow up. Then I remind myself that if I did that I'd be missing out on all the wonderful things to come. Her first school play, learning to ride a bike, doing homework together, first boyfriends (despite what her Daddy says!) and those special Mother/Daughter moments that I cherish so much about my relationship with my own Mum.

I don't want to be a Mum that holds her child back because I'm scared of losing the special little person she is now. Instead I'm going to watch her run from me into the next stage of her life and I'm going to smile and wave and encourage her to go. I might cry but my tears will be short-lived. I'm going to love every second of watching her grow.