Marching On

Yesterday morning we attended Bee's weekly group speech therapy session. As usual she scooted through the door with her walker and didn't look back shouting 'a-bye mama' all the way. I rescued her discarded walker and left her to sit with the books while waiting for the session to start. Every so often she would look up and say "mama? Boooo". Mama, book. Beautiful.

As the session started she scooted her bum towards the therapists, ready and eager to join in. The sessions can be a little overwhelming for Bee, she's never done structured group learning and here the other children are older, mobile and much more boisterous; shouting out answers and bouncing around. She tends to sit, wide-eyed and slightly open-mouthed, watching all the goings-on around her and taking everything in. Although the SLTs do take turns with each child, giving them an opportunity to interact.

Yesterday's session seemed a little different. Bee was a little more confident this time and joined in a little quicker. Sporadically she would turn to me with a big smile on her face but it was fleeting, her attention soon turned back to the myriad of toys coming out of the SLTs bag and the other children clustered around them.

Then it hit me, right there in the session: I was looking at my little girl as she will be at nursery, only two weeks away. Eager, alert, a little apprehensive but willing to try new things and join in. My heart ached to look at her, ached with love and a sense of loss for that little baby that is melting away right in front of my eyes. But most of all it was pride at the confident, strong and cheekily infectious little girl that is emerging from the cocoon.

Every day I feel overwhelmed with love for her

Every day she makes me proud of what she achieves

Every day I dread that inevitable march towards adulthood

And every day I look forward to the person she'll grow into along the way

I love you my beautiful little Bumblebee

Love and sloppy kisses (coz they're the best kind)

Mama xxx